There’s a reason you’ve heard it a hundred times: You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
But let’s take that one step further. In this episode of the Heartland Multifamily Show, I’m continuing the Manifesto of a Successful Multifamily Investor with a principle I consider non-negotiable:
You will become the leader you spend most of your time with.
I’m not just talking about your business partners, mastermind members, or even mentors. It includes the voices you let into your head on a daily basis. The books you read. The podcasts you listen to. The media you consumer Every one of them is shaping your decision-making, your mindset, and your leadership style.
If you’re serious about becoming a better leader, you have to be ruthless about removing what doesn’t serve you.
Start by taking inventory. What are you consuming that isn’t aligned with the leader you want to become? Who do you give your energy to that pulls you off track? What habits, distractions, or even relationships have quietly become liabilities?
This isn’t about being cold. It’s about being intentional. If you’re always “on the fence,” you’ll never grow roots as a leader.
Next, make a decision: What’s coming off your list?
Every great leader I’ve worked with has gone through this pruning process. The mistake is thinking that leadership is only about adding new information. But in reality, growth usually starts with subtraction.
And here’s a key reminder: everyone’s timeline is different.
Some people need to hear something five times before it clicks. Others need to experience real pain before they take inventory. That’s okay. But don’t mistake patience with procrastination. Your leadership is only as strong as the influences shaping it.
So if you’re ready to grow:
- Audit your inputs. What are you watching, listening to, and allowing into your mental space?
- Subtract what doesn’t serve. The fastest growth often comes from what you remove, not what you add.
- Surround yourself with leadership examples worth modeling. Whether through content, community, or mentorship, proximity matters.
Because over time, you will become the leader you spend the most time with.
